Because
four days just wasn't enough, now Comicon
starts on Wednesday evening, sneak preview style. Everyone's dripping,
the air conditioner was off most of the day, and gas powered vehicles
are driving through to get just the right amount of stank in the air.
A crane driving indoors is always bizarre. The floor is three or four
New York city blocks from end to end, and Artist Alley is at The Other
End. A few people were getting through on bicycle. I walk from the nice
muffled book-selling section into the lights-monitors-noise section and
finally into the unkempt-people-drawing section. It's hard to believe
this all grew from the shows organized by Shel Dorf and held at the El
Cortez hotel. Really not much to say about this part, so let's skip to... Thursday This is you attendees: "Where's Lieber? Where's Lieber? Where's
Steve Lieber? I thought he'd be sitting with you! Where's Lieber?" This is me: "Steve is drawing the next Road to Perdition
sequel, and has a pretty tight deadline, or else he'd be here, you betcha."
He really did hate missing the show, so I periodically called from the
floor to let him in on the experience. He recorded
some of his doings at home, I'll put those in. His studiomates
from Mercury
Studio were seated in a row in the Alley. I got a good workplace
anecdote from them, remind me to tell you in a bit. One of the where's-Liebers
was from Scott
Hudlow, who was seriously interested in buying all the pages
from the Hellboy story Steve just drew in Weird Tales. So
see, never miss a show you're on the list for. Scott had a backpack with
his baby in it, placed just perfectly to allow the child to pull his dad's
hair as hard as possible. Speaking of tots, anyone who even remotely knew
me had to endure me showing them baby pictures of Allison. Thanks everyone,
you were all very understanding and accomodating. Especially Ann Busiek,
who gave me a good thorough breakdown of what to expect in the next few
months.
Old college buddy Marc Hodge helped out at my table again this year, thank
goodness. He's a great artist and a saint for suffering my four days of
chiding him for not drawing enough ( I know- the idea of talented people
who don't produce-- can you believe it?). When Donna Nolan-Weathington
showed up with my script for her book on classic tales (see the Heroes
Report), I browbeat Marc into agreeing to work with me on the
story. Now people will see his mad skillz. He also was forced to
draw in people's sketchbooks during the show for practice.
I was on the corner, and next to me was the never-disappointing Russ
Heath. I got to see lots of his classic pages being brought
to him for signatures. Russ pulls in a heavy contingent of fellers in
cowboy hats, I noticed. Behind me was the Naughty Santa of comics, Mike
Kaluta. There was almost always a cultish gathering around
Kaluta when he was at the table, and next to him was the talented Janine
Johnston. And that was about all the artists around me, adjoining
tables were actually empty due to the increased size of the Alley. In
past years, cartoonists were holding deathmatches to secure a table, but
not today. Meanwhile...
The
room is so big that no one has made it back here yet, so I go on walkabout.Peeking
through the DC Comics section, I run into Joe Casey, wearing Grant Morrison's
trademark sunglasses. I wish I had some on, the monitors and lights on
the con floor are rewiring my brain. Joe has an interesting quirk; if
he finds something you're discussing humorous, he doesn't acknowledge
it as you go along, he saves all his mirth up for one big, startling "HA!"
when you're done speaking. Very economical, if not unsettling.
I see Michael Chabon zipping through the room, wide-eyed. At least it
looked like him. Probably was.
Over at the Dark Horse area, I thank editor Scott Allie for putting me
onto author Arturo
Perez Reverte, simply an amazing writer. In mid-sentence Scott
suddenly covers his face with his hand as if we were playing Peekaboo.
Huh? Turns out some really annoying guy who's always trying to ingratiate
himself to creators and editors by "playfully trashing them"
was passing by. At a past show he butted in on Scott and a popular artist
with repeated "this guy's a bum" and "whaddya wanna talk
to him for?" shtick. A word to anyone who does this (though it'll
probably not reach the target, as mostly only good people read these reports):
Everybody gets it. It's not funny.It's always clear you're not an actual
friend of the person you're trying to leverage yourself in with. It works
against you. Stop it.
In fact, this would be a good place to do something that needs doing.
Perhaps a handy set of guidelines of general convention etiquette is in
order, and you can post the text around in places you think it needs to
be seen. I'll start this, and invite others to contribute more rules that
I can put in future reports. Lieber and I have been hoarding this for
years, but I think we'd all be better off if it were shareware...
CONVENTIONAL
WISDOM
No Cutting. Everyone hates this one-- you've just got an audience
with someone you've been wanting to speak with, and another friend or
acquaintance of theirs cuts right in on you two as if you weren't saying
anything. If you're the Interrupter, and you just have something quick
to say, apologize for the intrusion and make it quick. If you're the
person that the Interrupter is trying to speak with, tell him you'll
get to him later. There's also a reverse version of this... Help Out Your Pal. You see Creator X or Friend X being beleaguered
by some boor who's sucking the life out of them. It's obvious from body
language what's happening. Make up some emergency meeting or phone call
to get them the hell out of this. And make the scenario something that
can't be dealt with quickly, so the lifesucker won't expect to resume
draining. No Tagging Along. A few people are gathering to head somewhere,
probably for food. You've been in clear visual proximity for some time
now, yet no one has asked you to join. Walk away. Especially if it looks
like a situation where a publisher is going to buy the meal, then you're
draining an expense account, and likely embarrassing the person you
knew enough to stand nearby. Sometimes the gathering party simply don't
see each other much, and want to set aside time to catch up. Or need
to discuss business, despite the fact that they like your company. Sing For Your Supper
Now say you are invited, and maybe someone else is treating. You are
now the monkey, so make some effort to amuse your patrons. If you draw,
draw fun pictures during dinner, or put a nice sketch in their sketchbook.
If you're a writer and raconteur, then tell some good stories. Got funny
gossip? That's worth dessert right there. Don't make yourself the center
of attention unless they want that. Don't feel important because you
were brought out for the night. Do try to include the whole table in
on things instead of focusing on one or two people. Stop trying to steer
the conversation onto something you want to talk about, work with what's
there. Wait For Business Cards to be Offered. In Japan, when someone
gives you their business card, it's a serious thing that means they
think well of you and are moving to a new stage of familiarity. Here
we swap them as if we're playing Go Fish. There has to be a happy medium,
after all that thing has a home number on it most of the time. No Pay Questions. Where did people get the idea that it was okay
to ask what you get paid? Do they do this with other professions? And
don't ask someone's page rate either, we can all see you doing the math
for annual in your head. Nor the particulars of a deal. It might be
okay to ask for ballpark figures, and practices to expect, but no details,
that's rude. No Grousing, Whining. Of course you're not getting enough work.
No one is. Shut up about it. Constantly mentioning that you need work
will just make people not want to give you any. Don't Stare. Okay, you can. Just a little.
Laugh at
my rules all you want, but Tom Fowler took my advice about not grousing
in public last year, and now he's rolling in good assignments. So it has
more to do with him being a really good artist, but still. Later at dinner
Tom entertained everyone with impressions of comics pros, while we received
"service" from Jessy, the world's angriest waitress. Despite
everyone being quiet and as polite as I've ever seen a group, she scowled
at us for daring to come in and eat at the Elephant and Castle during
normal business hours. We still left a good tip. Back upstairs roommate
Jim Ottaviani and I discussed Harry Potter and the Order of The Phoenix,
as we'd both just finished it. Harry's ornery in this one, watch out.
